As for myself, I finally feel like I have turned the corner in my recovery process. My mouth sores are starting to heal and my energy level is starting to come back. I still feel pretty miserable, but at least I am not getting any worse. The most frustrating thing for me is having to be patient. It is hard to wait for things to get better. I wish there was a button I could push to fast forward 2-3 weeks. It has been far too long feeling sick and down under. I am ready to feel "normal" again. Although, will I truly ever feel that way again?
I am also trying to keep my fears in check. Sometimes I start to freak out wondering if the cancer is still there. After all I have been through, it is hard to imagine to have to back down that road again or to have to endure a very complicated surgery to have the rest of the cancer removed. I don't know how to not be afraid. It is easier said than done. But I am hoping as I get better, the more busier I will become therefore the more distracted I will be, preventing me from thinking negative thoughts. Right now, I have too much time on my hands as I lay in bed trying to recover causing to me to think to much.
I read an amazing verse today that has given me a good perspective on having patience while going through this suffering:
1 Peter 2:19-20 "For one is regarded favorably, if as in the sight of God, he endures the pain of unjust suffering. After all what kind of glory is there in it if, when you do wrong and are punished for it, you take it patiently? But if you bear patiently with suffering when you do right and that is undeserved, it is acceptable and pleasing to God."
Please continue to pray for a quick recovery and for the cancer to be gone! Also, please pray for peace of mind so that I will not get overwhelmed by fear.
Thank you all for your prayers. I can't believe how many of you continue to send me encouragement through cards, gifts and messages on my blog. It helps me to keep going!!!
With much love,